


Do a Hit

by contemptofthelearned



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Face Punching, Gen, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, Michael is having a bad day, My First AO3 Post, Punching, and he's still mad at jeremy, by any means necessary, jeremy just wants things to be better, sorry if I leave out any important tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-09
Updated: 2017-07-09
Packaged: 2018-11-30 01:58:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,432
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11453598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/contemptofthelearned/pseuds/contemptofthelearned
Summary: "I’m…..I’m SO sorry Michael and whatever I can do to prove that to you, I’ll do it. Even if you never wanna see me ever again, if you wanna stop being friends as if we never were, or if you-““I wanna punch you.”“Sure.” Jeremy doesn’t even stop to think about it. If this is what Michael needs, what he needs to prove himself…well. At least he knows how to handle the pain better now. At least he deserves this.





	Do a Hit

**Author's Note:**

  * For [optionalposter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/optionalposter/gifts).



> I wrote this because ao3 user optionalposter and I needed Jeremy to Get A Hit done on him by Michael. I apologize for this. I'm only posting it cause they're gonna write more based off of it. I also apologize for the formatting.
> 
> Don't do a hit, kids.

Jeremy sits up with a start, tears trailing down his cheeks. He breathes heavily as he looks uselessly around his room. All he can think about is his nightmare and how he treated Michael that night.

‘The squip is gone, the squip is gone, it wasn’t real’ he thinks this over and over as he starts to calm down. ‘It was just a nightmare.’

‘ **Wrong. And you know it.** ’ Jeremy jerks and lets out another sob as he buries his face in his hands.

‘ **You really did treat Michael like that. You ignored him, treated him like dirt. You threw away 12 years of friendship for a girl you hardly even knew. And I hardly had to do anything. I wasn’t even online when you crushed him under your heel. And now you don’t even afford him an apology. What an awful human being.** ’

Jeremy jerks up at that. An apology! He’d never apologized!

‘ **Funny how it’s been weeks and you still need _my_ help to realize this. Pathetic.** ’

Jeremy scrambles out of bed, not bothering to check the time or even grab his phone as he stumbles messily into clothes and out his door. He somehow makes it out the front door without alerting his dad and after realizing that he doesn’t have a car he starts to book it down the street. Luckily, Michael doesn’t live too far from his house to walk so he gets there in record time. He doesn’t bother with the front door, knowing that the Mells are all probably asleep and that Michael would be in the basement which has its own door. He knocks as loudly as he dares. He doesn’t know what time it is but if Michael hasn’t changed too much in the past few weeks then he’s probably awake.

A disgruntled looking Michael answers the door and Jeremy knows that he’s mad at him and that he’d probably made it worse coming over so late. The hard look softens a little as he takes in Jeremy in messy clothes with red eyes, dark under eye bags, and tears still rolling idly down his cheeks.

“What do you want?”

“Michael I’m so sorry it’s so late but I woke up and I realized that I hadn’t apologized for what a shitty friend I’ve been lately and I just-I f-felt like I had to tell you right now. I had to tell you before I forgot or I drowned in his voice and the darkne-“

Michael’s angry voice cut in and oh he looks furious. “Oh so you only apologize when it helps _you_ , huh? Typical. Night.” He goes to turn away.

Jeremy frantically goes to grab his arm but let’s go as soon as he’s touched him. “No! No, this isn’t about me! This is about you! A-And us! I just wanted to let you know that it was so wrong of me to do what I did!”

Michael turns back around, his face still angry and distrustful. “If you’re so sorry, why’s it taken you weeks to come over here? It’s not like I’m hard to track down.” A self-deprecating scoff and Jeremy feels his stomach sink.

Jeremy thinks about telling him about the squip, about the voice and the words and the way his body feels wrong in the world and his brain feels like static at all times and the way the world is constantly spinning the wrong way but that’s just him whining, right? That’s just him complaining and what come out is, “I know, I know, I have no excuse. I didn’t even think about it ‘til right now and even that’s shitty of me and I’m an awful, terrible person and an even shittier friend but I just wanted you to know that all that shit I did and said wasn’t about you. It was all me and none of it was true Michael. Y-you’re perfect and wonderful and the best guy a person could know and I took that for granted like _always_ and I just needed you to know. I’m…..I’m SO sorry Michael and whatever I can do to prove that to you, I’ll do it. Even if you never wanna see me ever again, if you wanna stop being friends as if we never were, or if you-“

“I wanna punch you.”

“Sure.” Jeremy doesn’t even stop to think about it. If this is what Michael needs, what he needs to prove himself…well. At least he knows how to handle the pain better now. At least he deserves this.

That seems to throw Michael for a loop. Jeremy doesn’t know why, it was his idea, but he seems uncomfortable all the same.

“I-I won’t move I promise! Or try and stop you or tell anyone I swear.” Jeremy is sure his face looks desperate. “Whatever it takes, Michael.”

He’s almost not expecting it but Michael’s fist hits the side of his face hard and he stumbles to the side a little before steadying himself. He can’t even look up before a fist hits his stomach and he falls to his knees. He coughs a little and then Michael has kicked him onto his back. Before he can even blink, Michael is on top of him and punches him once more in the face before resting tight, angry fists on Jeremy’s chest. He can taste copper and somethings sliding down his face but he isn’t sure if it’s blood or tears.

Either way, it doesn’t matter. He deserves it. He deserves it all. Whatever makes Michael happy. Whatever can make up for everything terrible about him.

He glances up at Michael after he hasn’t moved for a while besides his quick, angry breaths. “You can keep going.” He hopes that he looks sincere but he can kinda see the squip from the corner of his eye and he looks disgusted so maybe he didn’t quite pull it off.

Michael startles and seems to come back to himself a bit. He looks at Jeremy’s face and his own fist and he looks so pale. He jerks his fists back to his chest like, like he’s afraid of touching Jeremy and Jeremy wonders if he’s worried about catching whatever makes him terrible but if he’s avoided it for 12 years he’s sure he won’t get it now. Michael’s breathing faster now but in a way that worries him.

“Michael, are you alright?” He’s reaching up a hand before he can think about it, to-to touch his face or something and Michael jerks away from him and is standing up. That feels like a dagger to his heart but he doesn’t let it show. He jerks himself to a sitting position and glances up at Michael.

“Was that enough? Do you need more? I promise Michael, whatever it takes to prove-“ and before he can finish that sentence Michael has him in a tight hug and Jeremy can’t stop the relieved sob that comes out and he returns the embrace.

“Jeremy, oh my god, I’m so sorry! I’m _so so so sorry_!” Jeremy frowns a little at that – Michael didn’t do anything wrong – before mentally shrugging and rubbing his back. After a few minutes, Michael helps him up and takes him into the bathroom to clean him up. Turns out his nose was bleeding. Michael looks sad the entire time but Jeremy doesn’t know why so he doesn’t say anything. When he’s done, Michael gives him another hug before Jeremy goes home. He feels a little better, not physically but emotionally. He goes to sleep and doesn’t dream the rest of the night.

\-------------------------------------------------

He’s glad that his face doesn’t bruise too bad the next day. The only thing that looks bad is his nose and he just waves any concern away by embarrassedly explaining that he tripped on his sheets getting out of bed and smacked face first into the ground. Everyone believes him and his stomach feels like the world, swaying around and around uneasily. Michael comes up to him on his own but he seems uncomfortable and he keeps looking at Jeremy’s nose. Jeremy cracks a joke and Michael gives a half-hearted laugh but it’s better than nothing.

By the end of the week, they almost seem back to pre-squip normal, making jokes and laughing together like best friends. Jeremy feels as if something ugly has lifted from him and his body seems to fit a bit better, the static a little less loud.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------

Two weeks later and Michael is angry again. Jeremy doesn’t know what he did but he’s desperate to fix it. He catches Michael staring at him from the corner of his eye sometimes and he looks so angry but when he looks at him, he just seems sad. He’s noticed that it happens mostly when he’s been talking to the squip, or he does something the squip would have said, or he does something the squip _did_ say he should do, or once when he was staring at Jeremy’s back and he thinks Michael might have seen the scars.

He thinks he might know what’ll help. It’ll make Michael happy and it’ll help him learn how to not hurt Michael. How to be better.

“Michael, mind if I come over after school today?”

Michael looks a little shocked, which is fine. He hasn’t asked or been asked to come over since before the whole squip thing. The only time he’s even been to Michael’s house is the night he apologized.

“Sure, Jer! You up for a little Apocalypse of the Damned?” He looks happy now and that’s good. He’ll just have to apologize again and then they’ll play games and Michael will be good. He deserves to be good, and happy, and everything. He deserves much more than Jeremy.

“Sure! Maybe we can finally beat level 9!”

\-----------------------------------------------------------

After school, they find their selves in the Mells’ basement, AKA Michael’s room. Michael is chatting excitedly about their plans and about the game so Jeremy thinks it might not be a good time to bring anything up. But then again he doesn’t want things to fester, doesn’t want Michael to let the bad things eat away at him inside like is happening to himself. Once everything is situated and Michael is about to plop down in his bean bag, Jeremy grabs his hand to halt him. Michael turns to him confused and the look only intensifies as Jeremy drops to his knees on the hard floor.

“Hey…Whatcha doin’ buddy?” His tone is wary. Jeremy looks up at him with wide eyes.

“You’ve been mad lately. You look at me and when you think I’m not paying attention you look mad but when I look you just look sad. That’s-I just wanted to apologize. For-For whatever I said to make you mad! I really didn’t mean it and I’m trying to figure out how things work without the squip but I’m sure I’m messing it all up and I-I-I just wanted to say I’m so sorry!”

Now Michael looks mad _and_ sad and Jeremy curses himself out in his head.

“No no no Jeremy, you didn’t do anything. It’s-I’m not-It’s not you I’m mad at!”

“Of course I did! Everything is my fault so I wanted to make it up to you.”

Michael looked at his face then the position he was in on the floor and then suddenly looked sick.

“Oh-oh my god Jer no! I’m-I’m not gonna-I shouldn’t have punched you the first time! I’m not gonna beat you up _again_!”

“What? Why not? It helped last time didn’t it? I swear Michael, _whatever_ it takes to make it up to you, to show you how sorry I am, I’ll do it!”

“I’m not gonna beat you up Jeremy!”

“ _Please!_ ”

“No!”

Jeremy bust into tears. Why wouldn’t Michael accept his apology? What had he done that was so much _worse than the squip_ that he wouldn’t even try to forgive him? Or maybe he hadn’t really forgiven him from last time? Why was he so terrible, so awful? What would he do without Michael?

Michael dropped to his knees as well, quickly pulling Jeremy into a tight hug.

“Michael I’m sorry so sorry please let me make it up to you I don’t know-I don’t know what I _did_ but please! I’ll make it up to you!” He pulled back to stare Michael in the eye, show that he was sincere, as he grabbed fistfuls of Michael’s shirt. “P-Please anything I-I’ll do anything! It didn’t even hurt that much last time. Not-not as much as the squip and this time it was for something good instead of bad and I swear I didn’t tell anyone and I won’t tell anyone I _promise_! I won’t fight back please, please forgive me!”

“Jesus Christ.” It wasn’t more than a whisper as he pulled Jeremy back into himself, curling around him. “You gotta get some help man.”

“Wh-whatever you want, please, whatever you want.”

“Whatever I want huh…” Still whispering, Michael began to run one hand through Jeremy’s hair gently. “You know what would make me happy Jer?” Jeremy froze, as if he was focusing every fiber of his being on Michael’s words.

“It’d make me happy if we just sat here like this until you felt better.” That didn’t make sense. If he’d learned anything from the squip, from Michael, it was that hurt made you better. But if it made Michael happy, made him forgive him, he’d do anything.

They sat there for over an hour, just holding on to each other until the voices in Jeremy’s brain started to calm down, until there were no more tears and no more frantic apologies, until Michael was able to hold the entire world steady for Jeremy like Atlas.

“Better?” Michael was still whispering but it was nice. Jeremy nodded his head. God he was tired. “How about we take a nap, huh?” Again, Jeremy nodded but didn’t move. In Michael’s arms, everything felt a little more right and he didn’t wanna give that up. “Don’t wanna move, huh? That’s fine, we can just stay right here.” Michael was able to position them so that they were laying mostly on their beanbag chairs. Maybe not the most comfortable place to lay down but it meant they didn’t have to move and Michael didn’t have to let go of Jeremy.

“We should talk to someone about this in the morning, huh?” Michael asked but Jeremy didn’t think he wanted an answer. His response should have been obvious either way. Whatever made Michael happy.

**Author's Note:**

> Go check out optionalposter's fic Don't Do A Hit!!! It's amazing and lovely and from Michael's POV!!
> 
> http://archiveofourown.org/works/11453880/chapters/25674435/


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